When you compare….you always lose.

In society today it seems like people are forced to compare themselves to others to see if they stack up.  We see this especially in social media…you see your friends or your old friends from school living out a perfect life on the beach or a precious moment with their kids.  All the meanwhile your life is falling apart…your kids will not comply with anything you ask of them and you have not had a vacation in….forever.  My point is that we often see ourselves admiring the highlight reel of everyones lives and can get quickly depressed when we look at our lives that feel like a mess.

The reality of this issue is that we ALL have issues.  We all have struggles….we all are NOT perfect no matter what our FaceBook updates say.  We all get dressed one pant leg at a time and we all use the toilet the same way.  We all are made differently with unique characteristics:  Body composition, personalities, backgrounds, etc.

I see this with women more than men….but it still is true for us all.  The feeling of not stacking up.  The reality is they have no real barometer of what real life looks like or even should be.  It is no wonder the divorce rates are up and we see so much crime…but people seem so happy on social media.  People have adapted a false perspective of life as they have slowly disconnected from interpersonal relationships and live in a virtual world.

That is why I love being in a community of real folks sharing their lives together…being real with each other.  I get to meet with fellow married couples once a week and also a group of men every other week.  We get to discuss what we struggle with and get to encourage each other and at times give tough love to help each other.  Life is not easy despite what marketing ads, FaceBook and the superficial make up folks put on.  We ALL have issues and we ALL need each other to get through life.

Only you know your goals and only you know where you are coming from and where you want to be.  Connect with a friend, hire a coach, or use a counselor to help you see through the mess.  Using a random person to gauge your value off of, self worth and where you should be is foolish….we all know that, yet we all fall victim to it though.  I encourage us all to look inward and not outward….be brave and courageous.  Do not be tempted to look to others for a comparison.

What we all can do for each other is smile often and encourage each other….even offer a helping hand.  We can help each other if we choose to, but realize that everyones social media updates are their highlights and not the norm.


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