DON’T ask friends for advice….

This is some of the best advice I got when I was in college.  I was fortunate enough to be surrounded by some smart guys, most of which were older and further along in life.  Here is what I learned and how it has been invaluable for me in every way.  Worth the read…

“Surround yourself with people you want to be like”.  This is so true, as humans, we tend to reflect those people we are around.  An easy example is, have you ever had an overly negative person on a team or at work?  Before you know it the tone of that group quickly begins to view life through a lens of negativity.  You will quickly fall into that trap as well…not because you are negative but purely because you are constantly subject to that point of view.  It will infest your mind and how you approach things beyond that setting.

“You cannot rescue everyone”.  Meaning the people that you spend time with will rub off on you.  I have intentional relationships that I invest in to help others to help them but those relationships are few compared to the friends that build me up.  I have to ensure that I do not let those people bring in negative aspects into my life…we all want the tide to rise together.  And I have found connecting those people I am investing with to others that have positive traits will help them too.

Finally, do NOT ask your friends for advice/wisdom.  I do not mean one should not ask friends about things and share life’s ups and downs.  What I mean is when it comes to those important decisions that can change the direction of your future…do not ask your friends.  Why?

Most of your friends have similar interests.  You are likely in the same stages of life…, career, etc.  So what have I learned in how to handle these decisions?  Go find someone OLD!  What I mean is find someone who has been through the experiences you are going through currently.  They can share what worked or what did not work and what they wish they would have done.  Your current friends likely have not been through that scenario…they are likely in the middle of it with you.  They do not know the outcome of their decisions or have experience first hand.

As simple as this sounds, it can save yourself lots of heartaches and trouble.  When it comes to financial decisions, kids, marriage, etc…..find someone with grey hair….take them to lunch and ask them questions.  I guarantee they would love to help you avoid the mistakes they made.

So what does this have to do with the gym?  Everything- We have such a diverse group at our gym at varying stages of life.  We help each other to make us all better.  We have small groups meeting outside the gym with a diverse group of people discussing these topics.

I wish others took this advice more often as it has saved Jill and I lots of pitfalls.

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